Online Love: the hazards and rewards of E-Love
September 21st 2006 06:43
The erotic, unwieldy world of virtual love and E-dating has an etiquette all of its own. E-love guru Sue Ostler gives you girls the lowdown on the do’s and don’ts.
1.Stalker alert: Never, ever give your phone number straight away. Have several chats over the internet first, (once they have the number they may pester you or ring you at odds time of the night.)
2.Use the emails and computer chat to casually ask questions to give you a broad picture of your suitor. If you think you could be interested - make the date sooner rather than later as often that can be disappointing. Rule of thumb, it’s best not to waste too much time.
3.Buyer beware: the photos on the computer are generally the best that your lothario can find of themselves. They can often can be 5-15 years old the photo so hence they might look very, very different now. So suss out when the photo was taken, and prepare for a nasty surprise since there are very few recent photos around on the net.
4.When you put a profile up on a site, be super careful about what you write. If you’re a girl who just wants to have fun and you say so then that’s
how the men will treat you. You’ll be a Party Girl Date – someone to have fun with and then dump. Or, they’ll think you’re only interested in casual sex when in fact you’re wanting a future partner. Be clear about what you want and expect from a man but be open minded enough to embrace different sorts of guys.
5.When it comes to putting your photos up, it’s best to put a nice but realistic photo of yourself rather than a glamour photo from a studio. Otherwise the guy may be disappointed when he sees you without the soft lens, color enhancement and makeup extravaganza. Not a good start!
7. He says he’ll call but…Don’t be disheartened if you think the date
went well and then wouldn’t you know it - he doesn’t contact you afterwards. Remember there are plenty of fish on the net and you never know who else he may be dating or even if he’s already involved or gasp, married. Be very wary and be prepared to accept that no matter how charming or well suited you may have thought they were, this is just not the right guy for you.
8.When communicating across the net or on an actual date, don’t go on about exes, bad relationships, bills or other banal problems in your life.
They don’t want to hear about it. Wear you charm shoes and be
positive, entertaining and funny. You can talk about the more serious stuff when you get to know them better.
9 Join a website that’s tailored to your taste and suits what you are after. There are many to choose from so take your time and have a good look at the other profiles of both men and women to see if it’s your cup of tea. Sure there are plenty of sites for those who want casual sex, but it can be a little harder to find reputable ones with genuine guys who really want to find the girl of their dreams - you. Do some research and stick to the big ones to start with.
10.Think of internet dating as a great way of learning about different
men as well as finding out more about what you want. In the worst case you’ll be making new friends, feeling good about yourself when you receive stacks of emails and meet guys you usually wouldn’t meet - whether they be future lovers or husbands, or just someone who puts a little bounce in your step. Just make sure you combine your virtual life with real life so you don’t turn into geek girl.
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